Jon Stewart Eviscerates Rand Paul’s Black History Slight Of Hand

RandFull transcript of last night’s “Daily Show” segment covering Senator Rand Paul (R-Kentucky) speaking at the historically black Howard University Tuesday. (or watch HERE)

SEN. RAND PAUL, R-KY (4/10/2013): How did the party that elected the first black U.S. Senator, the party that elected the first twenty African-American congressmen, how did that party become a party that now loses 95% of the black vote?

I’ll take that one.  See, because for the last 50 years, the Republican Party has embraced a craven political calculation known as the Southern Strategy, which stated that:

RICHARD NIXON (5/17/1970): From now on, the Republicans are never going to get more than 10% to 20% of the Negro vote.  And they don’t need any more than that.  The Republicans would be shortsighted if they weakened enforcement of the Voting Rights Act.  [Because] the more Negroes who register as Democrats in the South, the sooner the Negrophobe whites will quit the Democrats and become Republicans.  That’s where the votes are.

Unquote!From Nixon’s law and order, to Reagan’s Cadillac-driving welfare queens, to H.W. Bush’s Willie Horton campaign, all the way up to the present day, where the party had a serious presidential contender who lived on a ranch that had once been called, um….

RICK PERRY: … Niggerhead …

Riiiiiiiiiiight.  Right, that.So all that will tend to alienate a voting bloc.  Why do you think they’ve been voting for Democrats?

SEN. RAND PAUL, R-KY (4/10/2013): The Republican Party hasn’t talked enough about the great history and interaction between the Republican Party and black history and voting rights in our country. … The story of emancipation, of voting rights, and of citizenship from Frederick Douglass to the modern era is really, in fact, the history of the Republican Party. … We see horrible Jim Crow, and horrible racism that happened in the ’30s, ’40s, ’50s, it was all Democrats.  It wasn’t Republicans.

Right.  But for the most part, those bigoted Democrats — the ’30s, ’40s, ’50s — became Republicans post-the modern civil rights era because of it.  See, you can’t just yada, yada, yada the last 60 Republican years.“A Republican freed the slaves, gave black people the vote!  Yada, yada, yada, and now all blacks vote Democratic!  I mean, what the hell?”

And the problem with this theory that all that stands between the Republicans and a plurality of the black vote is a history lesson is… well, enjoy.

4/10/2013:SEN. RAND PAUL, R-KY: How many of you, if I would’ve said, who do you think the founders of the NAACP are?  Do you think they were Republicans or Democrats?  Would everybody in here know they were all Republicans?

HOWARD UNIVERSITY STUDENTS: Yes!!

SEN. RAND PAUL, R-KY: All right, all right.  You know more than I know.  And… OK, and that’s… and I don’t mean that to be insulting, I don’t know what you know, and you don’t….  You know, I mean I’m trying to find out what the connection is.

(audience boos)”Calm down, everybody, just calm down!  Red team, start the car!  Turns out I’m neither crazy nor brave!  The gray hair needs to be plucked, now!  Red team, remove the vanilla bean from the hot chocolate!  Red team!”

….

JON STEWART: What do you think about his — let’s call it — timeshare presentation for the Republican Party to the students?

LARRY WILMORE: Right.  Well, it’s tempting, Jon.  I mean, let’s be honest, black people have been with the Democratic Party for 50 years now, you know?  We’re looking for a little strange.

JON STEWART: But the Republicans, I mean, they’re not really strange.  I mean, you’ve tapped that before.  I mean, it’s….

LARRY WILMORE: Jon, we tapped it for 100 years.  See, that’s the problem, there are no other moves.  Were we in love once?  Yes.  But, people change.  So do parties.

JON STEWART: Well, it sounds like the Republicans would very much like to rekindle the relationship by reminding you of the good times that you shared.

LARRY WILMORE: Right.  Yeah, you know what happens when you get back with someone.  You know, it’s fun for a while, until you remember this is exactly how you felt before you caught them in bed with the Dixiecrats.

JON STEWART: The Republicans left the black, and now they want to come back.

(audience laughter and applause as Jon and Larry do a fist bump)

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